My Philosophy Of Love Sex and Everything in Between

⚠️Warning ⚠️

Caution, these are my humble opinions from my experience and my lessons learned with women, etc. is it not facts? Is it not generalizations, rather just an opinion of this guy. lol

Now I need to share some of my approaches and philosophies of sex and love at this time. I know that those first moments of intimacy are the best and are truly beyond fun and amazing. 

First, women control sex, period, end of story no if’s ands or butts, unless they allow it. We as men have to know and accept this and not try to change it because it will never change. The best thing to treat your significant other as well as possible consistently. Make his/her dreams come true and then you will get those intimate physical moments that us men live on and starve without. Treat your partner the way you would want to be treated, but better. Respect and comfort are critical. Most if not all women think they look hideous. It’s not true and you must do all you can to dispel these negative image thoughts because they will hinder you in the bedroom. Build your woman up, tell her she looks amazing and that you feel amazing just standing next to her. Be honest, of course because that should be true or why are you even with her in the first place? 

Plan things out, the perfect dinner, the best time she can have. Drive her, open all doors and order for her at the restaurant after she shares what she wants. Women want a man that can be confident and in control and demonstrate that you can be without being over-bearing. They want to feel safe and know that their needs are being met in every way. You need to help her feel well enough to get naked with you and that’s no small task. I’m an empath and still struggle with the details and keep in mind even if you do everything perfectly it can and often still will not go the way you would like, but that is ok. You will be closer to her for this and she will receive a lot of intimacy even if you don’t and this will bode well for you in the future.

Women are complex amazingly challenging creatures and any number of things in their own minds can take sex out of the picture even if you do your best to help reassure them that they are safe, sexy and beautiful. If this happens, and it will (a lot), just enjoy the moment and quality time you spend together. And believe, me she will remember, and it is a good time to appreciate each other’s company. Sex should never be a goal, it should be an ideal or a place you’d like to get to and if you enjoy and appreciate each other, you will get there at least occasionally. That’s as good as it will get. The grand creator has a great sense of humor. Men are made hungry and women are made thirsty. It is difficult to create a perfect meal that both can enjoy, and sometimes its almost a happy accident. Enjoy it when it happens. In the meantime, treat women the way you know they deserve to be treated not just because they control sex and all physical love but because they will protect and help you too if you help them feel save and empowered.

What about other people, you say! “Joey Schlamoze gets sec every night and Lanie Schlamaze always makes love to her man…” Do not compare, of course you are going to see and hear the best from others because they want you to despise them and want their life. They don’t tell you about the times their partner(s) hit them or have psychological issues. They do not tell you that sex is the only love they know and have. The adage never gets lost that the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. In reality, life doesn’t give most of us even remotely close to what we want, but some are great at masking it making their lives seem ideal. Its all a façade, the happiest sounding people often are far from it. They just want others to envy their life. Worry about your own happiness and keep your lawn (life) healthy always doing what is best for you and your own happiness.

            Ok sex, this is not going to be explicit, at all. I am not Dr. Ruth, nor do I claim to be an expert in anything. This is just my philosophy on sex. I cannot emphasize this enough as it bears repeating, in heterosexual relationships women control sex. Any men attempting to control sex in heterosexual relationships are likely misfits in society and need to be taken out and put away someplace very safe and secure for a long long time. Now, believe it or not we spent a lot of time already taking about women and sex. It is all about how they feel in general and at the time. You want your partner to feel safe with you. You want her to feel cherished beautiful and sexy whether she is thin like a rail or curvy and cute. Appreciate all over her, this starts with her mind. Nothing is sexier than a smart strong-minded woman. Man-up and allow her to be strong, embrace it and have no fear. She is with you that should tell you all you need to know. Listen to what she says with words and her body and you will please her as much as she can stand. Then definitely stop, when she tells you to. 

            Do not worry about your pleasure, if she is feeling, happy, safe, appreciated, fulfilled she will turn that on you. And believe me, you will also feel happy and very appreciated afterwards. That is, it simple, it is all about the woman’s mind. You need to help her feel attractive, safe and secure, and as long as the planets align (it takes that too sometimes) she will let you have her… 

Even if not, you are doing it right, keep in mind there are a million factors that need to be satisfied for sex to happen, and there’s a better than good chance some of them will prevent it from happening. This happens (a lot), do not think it is you or a lack of attraction. It could be anything from a woman feeling heavy because she didn’t like the way a dress looked on her to a model in a magazine article that makes her feel ugly. Never give up hope and do not blame yourself or you’ll go down a rough road that may never end. Take care of you when you need that, she will understand or should as you need a safe harmless release more often than not as we as men need ‘physical affection’. Women do not, remember that…

thank you for reading.

-aaa

Originally Published 06/05/2024

She Wanted…

She wanted to be pleased

So I obliged her.

She wanted to feel safe

So I protected her.

She wanted to feel love

So I loved her.

She wanted to be taken

So I took her.

She wanted to be excited

So I excited her.

She wanted to be delighted.

So I delighted her.

She wanted appreciation

So I appreciated her.

She wanted to relaxation

So I relaxed her.

She wanted to be desired

So I desired her.

She wanted to be admired

So I admired her.

She wanted peace

So I calmed her.

She wanted to share vulnerability

So I trusted her.

She wanted to be kissed

So I kissed her.

She wanted to be missed

So I missed her.

She wanted to belong

So I held her.

She wanted to be strong

So I strengthened her.

She wanted to be free

So I freed her…

-aaa

Originally Published 05/23/2024

Word of The Day “Neglected”

Four Quatrains of Neglect

Oppressed husband and cruel life – Steemit

I felt quite neglected

It’s just that simple

Didn’t receive love as expected

Instead of a wave, a ripple

I adored you every day

And do many little things

That’s why I feel dismay

That inequality brings

I told you truth

And dealt with your vice

You were always were uncouth

With your pack of lies

As I pay this final alimony

It hurts me like a knife

A manipulating phony

And never quite a wife…

-aaa

Originally Published 05/19/2024

I’m Gone

Use me

abuse me

and you’ll lose me

Flake me

Fake me

And you’ll mistake me

Hurt me

Shirk me

And I’ll dessert thee

Push me

Prod me

And flog me.

I thought you were the one

Instead you used me for fun

And now I’m done…

-aaa

Originally Published 05/18/2024

Taking on today’s Word of the day which is  “Cheat”

https://wordofthedaychallenge.wordpress.com/2024/05/16/cheat/

IF I EVER THOUGHT THEY YOU’D CHEAT

If I ever thought that you’d cheat,

then I never would’ve loved you.

If I ever thought that you’d cheat,

then I’d’ve known I was miles above you.

If I ever thought that you’d cheat,

then I never would’ve proposed to you.

If I’d ever thought you’d cheat,

then I wouldn’t have given the most to you.

If I ever thought that you’d cheat,

then I wouldn’t’ve given flowers to you.

If I ever thought that you’d cheat,

then I wouldn’t have given hours to you .

If I ever thought that you’d cheat,

then I wouldn’t have given my soul to you.

If I ever thought that you’d cheat,

then I wouldn’t have given control to you.

If I ever thought that you’d cheat,

then I wouldn’t have given my heart to you.

If I ever thought that you’d cheat,

then I wouldn’t even start with you.

If I ever thought that you’d cheat,

then I wouldn’t have married you.

If I ever thought that you’d cheat,

then I wouldn’t have carried you.

If I ever thought that you’d cheat,

then I wouldn’t have fought for you.

If I ever thought that you’d cheat,

then I wouldn’t’ve spent or bought for you.

If I ever thought that you’d cheat,

then I wouldn’t of been a friend to you.

If I ever thought that you’d cheat,

then I’d sooner end it with you.

-AAA 05/17/2024

Originally Published 05/17/2024

No Happy Endings Aka The Leftovers

For some of us, there are no happy endings

No twenty year anniversaries to celebrate

Instead, divorces with alimonies pending

Leaves us remaining of in a frazzled state.

Some were high school sweethearts

Or college friends from long ago

Many of which lead to two happy hearts

While the rest of us are just status quo.

What did we do that was so wrong?

To end up with such gruesome loves

I guess we sang to a different song

With circling vultures instead of doves.

We try our best to not have envy

Watching you all celebrate

Hold it together as best we can be

Looking only to ourselves, to appreciate.

A pure love that we all read about

That is what your lives have shown

Selflessness and sacrifice in large amount

Those things, from others, we’ve never known.

So please remember us, solitary souls

As your anniversary years accrue

As we’re finding all the answers alone

Remember, you’re lucky, that someone truly loves you…

-AAA 05/17/2024

Originally Published 05/17/2024

Ghosted And Dropped

In this time of crying.

You don’t see me there.

Gasping, choking, sighing.

Desperately, grasping for air.

Why did you leave me?

Where did you go?

Why must you deceive me?

I am reeling from the blow.

What did I do?

That wasn’t good enough.

Why weren’t you true?

This deception was rough.

All of your kisses.

Truly didn’t mean a thing.

My perceived hits were misses.

Hence, I was never your king.

I thought you were my forever.

Forever, plus a day.

In reality you were never.

Ever intending to stay.

First, you started ghosting.

Avoiding me in chat.

Barely responding to my posting.

You left me hard and flat.

You said you couldn’t love me.

When I told you “I love you”.

Your rejection, just crushed me.

At the time knowing not what I’d do.

So I bitterly reminisce you.

Now that you’re long gone.

And I’ll never again kiss you.

As you used me like a pawn…

-aaa

Originally Published 05/10/2024

Know Your Worth!

Many people have no rhyme or reason

They’re there for a week or maybe a season

You value their time but you’re just a choice

In the scheme of things you have no voice

You have strong feelings and you’re never late

Though you’re not their first choice for a date

As you wait, you chomp at the fetter

Wishing that they’d like you better

But nothing changes and you’re to blame

For staying an option and playing their games

Knowing they’re out with someone else

While you gather dust upon a shelf

You have much better things to do

And enjoying people who think so too

Be yourself and you’ll never finish last

Now discount your troubled past

Come back to a better living

Happy with your life of giving

Worry not, that the world has turned

Remember the lessons you have learned

Know you’re worth and don’t accept less

A future where you’re someone’s best

Take these words to heart and run

As now it’s your turn to have some fun…

-aaa

Originally Published 05/07/2024

Separate Ways

We had gone as far as we could.

Said all that we could say.

We can do no further good.

So neither of us want to stay.

Our last words are being said.

Along with a deep firm hug.

For one last time I held her head.

Feeling my heart give that familiar tug.

The times we had were very hard.

Many situations were each unfair.

Our story mapped on a crooked chart.

Painful times we both did share.

As I hold her for the last time.

Fresh warm tears stain my face.

Break-ups are horrible like the scene of a crime.

Pain, ruin, and destruction all over the place.

What was the final cause?

I’m not sure if we’ll ever know.

Many bad circumstances we tripped across.

Never finding any stability or flow.

We share heartfelt goodbyes.

And many “I’m sorries” in our embrace.

We let go, I give kiss her forehead as she cries.

I softly wipe the tears streaking down her face.

The life we shared now at an end.

And the memories of it today, are just a haze.

Once we were lovers, but now distant friends.

Parting, each we go our separate ways…

-aaa

Originally Published 05/06/2024

Caresses

“Touch me very softly”, she said

So I caressed her precious head

Running my fingers through hair

I can hear her gently sigh

Her feelings safe with none to fear

She closes both of her eyes

She drifts and floats to welcomed sleep

I hold her and her breathing is deep

She has a dream of a crystal clear lake

And the waters ebb in gentle waves

I have my dream, but I am awake

Receiving the love that my heart craves

She awakens well rested after a while

And I continue to hold her with a smile…

-aaa ❤️

Originally Published 05/03/2024

Missy’s MAD Challenge # 007

Every week, a creative prompt will be offered for you to unleash your imagination and artistic skills.

You can share your response in the form of art or any creative expression that the prompt inspires.

There are no restrictions and no deadlines, so feel free to take your time and enjoy the creative process.

Remember to label your response with #missysmadchallenge.

Your challenge for the week

  • The last time…

The Very Last Time 

The very last time 

I saw your face in person

I didn’t feel sad

I had finally moved on

You had moved on, on day one.

The very last time 

I spoke to you on the phone 

Wasn’t very bad

We agreed on divorce terms

And even laughed a few times.

The very last time 

I saw an image of you

You looked very old

We both aged a lot through this

Hopefully now a relief…

-AAA 09/16/2024

A love that Almost Was…

Originally Published 05/03/2024

Fire was in your eyes.

Embers spreading from your soul.

Fire’s out of control.

Love was in your heart.

Sweetest dreams were in your mind.

The passionate kind.

Gentle was your touch.

Your soft hands are everywhere.

Touched my face and hair.

Quite warm was your smile.

It would stop and melt my heart.

Adored from the start.

Velvet was your skin.

Silky-soft freckled and tan.

I once as your man.

So girly your laugh.

Higher pitched and very sweet.

Your humor a treat.

I’m so glad we met.

Those times I’ll never forget.

I have no regrets…

-aaa

Feast or Famine

Some lovers dreamt

Whilst others wept.

Some share their love 

While others push or shove.

Some grow stronger 

While others take longer.

Some find peace in each other

While some are still under cover.

Some live their very best lives

While others are ex husbands and wives.

Some linger and grow 

Others lose all control.

Some have fun all day

While others are far away.

Its feast or famine

In the rules of love

People must examine

Who fits them like a glove…

-AAA 08/21/2024

Hard Truths

Originally Published 04/28/2024

Recollecting the pasts loves of my life

I mediate and I close my eyes

I can see myself through their eyes

All the love that wasn’t reciprocated

All the deceit and manipulation

And then it hits me like a ton of bricks

They never saw me at all

They never truly knew me we or wanted to

They only knew what they needed and saw me as a means to get there

Knowing is empowerment

I’ll choose better, smarter next time…

-aaa ❤️

Dreamer of a Reality

Originally Published 04/28/2024

I can taste your color

And it appeals to me

You are like no other

That I have ever seen

My heart flutters

When you are near

I’m melting butter

Each time you appear

Come closer to me

So I can see your face

An endless sea

Of beauty in place

Beautiful hair that’s heaven sent

And stunning eyes that stop my heart

Knowing now what the ‘others’ meant

Truly sets your uniqueness apart

I pinch myself am I awake

Or maybe you are just a dream

Feeling you makes my insides ache

Perhaps it’s somewhere in between…

-aaa ❤️‍🔥

Mirror Souls

Originally Published 04/30/2024

Two hearts will be one

The time is now to have fun

Eyes bright, like the sun

Soft warm hazel eyes

Perfect legs and luscious thighs

My heart grows a size

No rush times my friend

Fun filled times without an end

Physics warps and bends

Time slows down our view

I know, crazy but it’s true

It happens with you

You feel like I do

Like you always wanted to

Bright futures a view

Trust in yourself now

Don’t worry about the how

Keep a solum vow

Dancing in the rain

No need to feel any pain

You’re yourself again

-aaa

Adversity (Thoughts Before the Final Divorce 5/18/22)

Originally Published 04/29/2024

What do you do when the well runs dry? When emotions are only anger and love dies

You reach out and communicate as much as possible but nothing changes her she just doesn’t want you anymore

You better youself and try to get stronger and more attractive but it has no effect and she is not impressed at all

what can I do or say to change how she feels and lives as nothing seems to impact her demeanor or how she feels

I’d seel my soul to get her to love me like I loved her that doesn’t work either she’s moved on

We do things but they feel like bones she has to throw rather than something she wants to do

I’d rather not be an obligation to anyone

I’d rather be a choice than an option

How will I go on, with all this hurt and pain

I always will, force of nature or habit, pick one

I love the kids and grandkids

How will I live without them, that’s very possible starts anew for the third time, is beyond sad

I can never get things right in my life always taking the course of highest resistance moving straight up hill forever seemingly

I just want to be a happy fellow and feel fully actualized in my life

To do so I have to build up myself created an infrastructure that has never existed

I have to create foundations pore concrete and lay down the plans for a new life and a new me that is able to be happy even if alone forever

I don’t know how I will do it all alone but I likely will have to and flourish despite the lonliness

I guess I am destined to be alone maybe it is as it should be…..

I will love myself somehow because it’s necessary.

If I don’t, then no one will…..

-aaa 9/20/21

Spellbound…

I cannot tell where I begin and where you end.

Our souls are so close they merge together.

Eyes closed no words yet we speak in the silence.

I can read every nuance of being and mine is also known.

Nothing is unspoken between us as we share everything.

Our worlds collide and merge into one.

An infinite universe just between two people.

The synergy we share is powerful and cannot/will not be denied…

-AAA 08/19/2024

Divine Timing Love Happens (Just not Right Away for Some)

Originally Published 04/21/2024

One day we’ll grow old together

Put our pieces each in place

Share many years through all weather

And each the wrinkles on our face

Finding adventure each unfurled

Dancing to our very own beat

Many travels all over the world

Excitement lies before our feet

No matter the time your eyes are the same

Your smile hasn’t changed at all

I’m smitten that is to blame

And every day in love I fall

I manifest your existence

Each night in my dreams

My true love persistence

Is more than it seems

One day our story will come to be

And we’ll be the envy of others

A new standard for all to see

When our dream life uncovers

Holding hands on porch swing

Watching the evening pass

Fly high on passion’s wing

With many great times to amass

We’re never too old to find a love of our lives

I’m 52 and I’m well on my way

Despite my two and a half ex wives

All my lessons learned and used here today

Synchronies daily often appear

11:11, 1:11, 3:33, and 2:22

All conformation a great future is near

And these numbers portend, well, you

When this happens, brightly clear

A divinely timed union we’ll be

As it happens I’ll blog it right here

Giving hope for all the world to see…

-aaa

So Long and Goodbye

What can I do 

What can I say 

I knew we were through

On that winter day.

Our love has long gone 

For the both of us 

From day one we were wrong

I guess we missed our bus.

There were no goodbyes 

No fond farewells spoken

We did our separate cries

Since we were irreparably broken.

Innocent others 

got caught up in our mess

Children, sisters, and brothers

Were hurt, I confess.

They didn’t understand 

That she and I were wrong

The ending was at hand 

The end of our song.

Breakups are messy things

We go our separate ways 

Feeling all of those stings 

Which go one for days.

Thinking of a better tomorrow

Is all that we can do

After we clear the sorrow 

And new things come into view.

So anyone who’s hurting

Needn’t worry about the past

One day all get their deserving

When all is done and passed…

-AAA 08/15/2024

Sweet Sleep Surrender

Originally Published 04/26/2024

Feel me, I am near you

Whisper and I’ll hear you

Share those secrets with me

Then let go and be free

Time will slow down, you needn’t worry

The universe doesn’t make us to hurry

Let’s enjoy our silver lining

Meeting in divine timing

The wait we endured has been too long

Any longer and our story would be a song

Through thick and thin clichés galore

Do stay longer and I’ll think of more

Just hold me tight and never let go

Even if the advanced hour tells you so

As the night deepens, you finally rest

Laying your soft head on my chest

I feel my heart start to soar

As you gently snore

Breathing soft and safe at last

From the horrors of your past

I finally close my eyes and drift away

Before the evening turns to day

I won’t move an inch as you gently sleep

For I know its relief is peaceful and deep

Blackness now surrounds this bed

As I drift away and lay back my head

-aaa

Passions Alive

Please, place your left hand in my right 

We’re not sleeping until late tonight.

To my room and in my bed 

Not to rest our pretty heads.

Kisses deep all over for you and I 

There’s no limit to where we’ll fly.

Sharing desires and shedding clothes

Where we end up, nobody knows.

Closer and closer, we’re both aware

Legs entangled but we don’t care.

There’ll be very little light, but we will see 

All of what passions are meant to be.

You give your trust and I’ll give mine 

And everything will end up fine.

Nothing but time and plenty to waste 

No need to approach this with haste.

After hours of passions supplied 

and we are mutually satisfied.

We turn off our phone’s morning alarms 

Then fall asleep in each other’s arms…

-AAA 08/08/2024

Married and Divorced to Ms Cruelty

She wouldn’t inflate his ego.

It just wasn’t her to be that kind.

She’d rather see him fall down.

As flat on his face as possible.

She wouldn’t let a single soul talk down to him

At the first word, she was a furious defender.

He mistook this for love and care.

In reality, putting him down was only her indulgence, and no one else’s.

She wouldn’t be intimate with him, ever.

She’d give every excuse from fibromyalgia to menopause.

He felt she was simply only attracted to his money.

He was right because she saved all her intimacy for her ex husband.

She’d instigate many fights at the expense of his dignity.

She’d mercilessly push him to his tipping point.

Then get mad at him for his reaction to her barrage of incendiary statements.

Then when he’d walk away to end the argument, she’d fire off another volley, a parting shot, “go pout”.

She didn’t care whether he lived or died.

His illnesses and complications from Diabetes were his problem.

Any symptoms or issue he experienced was all in his head.

She had the bedside manner of steel wool and the warmth to match.

Even when he left her she refused to be human.

Using the Ex grandchildren as weapons in her arsenal of cruelty.

She fought him tooth and nail for alimony.

Until he relented and paid her, a worthy price at any amount to be put of her life forever.

-08/04/2024

Love is Arithmetic ❤️ + ❤️ = 💞

Love is Arithmetic

Zero plus zero is none

Let’s add ones for fun.

One and one is two

Just like me and you.

Two and two make four

Enjoying good times more.

Three and three are six

We always get our kicks.

Four plus four are eight

As we never hesitate.

Five and five are ten

Let’s meet all over again…

-AAA 08/03/2024

Zero plus zero is none

Let’s add ones for fun.

One and one is two

Just like me and you.

Two and two make four

Enjoying good times more.

Three and three are six

We always get our kicks.

Four plus four are eight

As we never hesitate.

Five and five are ten

Let’s meet all over again…

-AAA 08/03/2024

Obsidian Delight

Originally Published 04/27/2024

Obsidian beauty of dark delight let me love you and caress your tenderness.

Let me meet your warmth in turn with mine in a union of desire.

Hold me never let go and I’ll the share never-ending passion until the sun goes out.

Soft inviting lips beckoning soft touches with soft scarlet insides.

Tingles, tickle innards as a flock of butterflies fill a stomach.

Breathless, basked in their warmth, figures entangle with one another.

Knowing not where one begins and the other ends.

A rushing gush of pleasure washes over us as well gently collapse.

Into soft inviting surroundings never letting go of one each other.

Sunlight , basks her inviting features as the lucky lover takes her in.

Eyes never blinking for a moment making a mental etch of her stunning features.

Beauty such is this is typically reserved for the Gods, not mortals like I.

Luck is an understatement as the brilliant raven crosses the room cutting the distance between us all.

She’s mine for the moment and a small eternity can last forever.

With each kiss and touch, a piece of crimson narcissus falls away taking all pain and sadness that was in the wake…

-aaa :-)(-;

E-Dating Disaster

Originally Published 04/26/2024

Not quite here or there

Not quite anywhere

Different than most of the guys

Wishing one was easier on the eyes

Moulded out of a cast thrown away

Feeling more and more like it every day

Looking for Yang to the yin in the stars

Always coming up short as who we are

Dozens of girls chats and dates

Always leaving with empty plates

Excuses fakes and stories abound

Can an honest woman be found?

Eharmony and Yahoo dating too

Is anyone real looking for you?

Cook, pay, wine and dine as we meet

Yet finding a match is more like a fete

Frustrations abound eyes water and sog

Maybe just give up and get a dog

Most men on these sites just want sex

Leaving dating potentials emotional wrecks

Looking for a ‘hookup’ is all they want

A roll in the hay and sexual jaunt

So not only just chew the fat

But also prove to be better than that

With weary hand to wetted eye

Hands to face the frustrated cry

It shouldn’t have to be this hard

Finding love with them on guard

But until remain like a frustrated muggle

In a world of magicians, a constant struggle

-01100001011000010110000100001010 (aaa)

Fair Weather Lovers

It’s fine just fine

The hands of time

Keep us in line

Definitely fine.

It’s no use just no use

Don’t be obtuse

There’s no excuse

Just no use.

It’s unfair just unfair

You never cared

I wasn’t aware

That’s it’s unfair.

It’s cruel just cruel

Played for a fool

Under your rule

Simply cruel

It’s mean just mean

That I was unseen

The way it’d always been

Very mean.

It’s the end just the end

My selfish friend

No compromise or bend

Goodbye, my friend.

-AAA 07/28/2024

Thank You

Originally Published 04/21/2024

Thank you for teaching me what love is not

Thank you for poisoning my every thought

Thank you for continuously using me

Thank you for emotionally abusing me

Thank you for not being generous to me

Thank you for taking advantage of all that you’d see

Thank you for mental slaps with a white glove

Thank you for teaching me I had unconditional love

Thank you for showing me all your hate

Thank you for showing me my own strength and faith

Thank you for doubting my every word

Thank you for demonstrating to me the absurd

Thank you for weaponizing love and sex

Thank you for empty accounts and bouncing checks

Thank you for the emasculations you gave

Thank you for the respect you’d never save

Thank you for not being in my life

Thank you for no longer being my wife

Thank you for the dog and pony

And thank you for that alimony…

-aaa

❤️Quantumess❤️

Originally Published 04/25/2024

If I saw you right now what would I say.

If there were song for it what would I play?

If time were under control how would we clock.

If music were our favorite how would we rock?

If light is a relative thing how do we shine.

If hearts are to hold why not mine?

If challenge of change makes me burn 🔥.

Is the price of wisdom worth the spurn?

If the heartbreak was required.

Why wasn’t she mired?

If love is for the all.

Why wouldn’t she fall?

If growth is great and fear is small.

Did you just master walking tall?

I think it’s worth the price of purest gold.

To perfectly align with half of a soul… ❤️

-aaa

Together At Last, My Ideal Manifestation

Originally Published 04/09/2024

I know you so well I know your taste.

That ecstasy contorted look on your face.

I know your beautiful scent.

Destinations we came and went.

New adventures of pleasures await.

Passport for passions with an ideal mate.

Covered in kisses if you desire.

Bodies entwined in instant fire.

Any request that you want to make.

Fulfilled with as much as you can take.

Share with me a deep embrace.

Not a single moment goes to waste.

Chasing dreams just you and me.

The way it was supposed to be.

We met on a random distant shore.

Understanding how it didn’t work out before.

Karmic lessons of our pasts.

Relationships that didn’t last.

All don’t matter wow.

As we’re together now.

It’s all no sudden wonder.

That we manifested each other.

Now silently together in a soft bed.

I caress a weary head.

Your breathing is very deep.

We drift together off to sleep.

-aaa

Imaginary Lovers, so it Seems

Did you exist

Were you real

You broke our tryst

With little appeal.

You unceremoniously were gone

With little more than “goodbye”

Feeling the loss I was thrust upon

Made me sigh and deeply cry.

I hope your new man is the best

Better than me, in the very least

If not, it’s your loss, I must confess

Since our fun exchanges ceased.

So many questions

Left unanswered

Infinite suggestions

Hurt my ego like a cancer.

In the end

You left me in the dark

Rather than a friend

You’re just a question mark…

-AAA 07/19/2024

The End, of Us

It’s over

It’s done now

A done deal

I see how.

You cheated

The whole time

Disbelief

You’re a slime.

Just to think

I felt bad

In my guilt

It’s so sad.

I realize

After this

There’s nothing

That I miss.

All your lies

And gaslights

Half told truths

Restless nights.

It’s in vain

Nothing saved

You laid down

Bye I waved.

Now happy?

All alone

Bills and debts

On your own.

Hope you think

As you pray

Was it worth

All those lays???

-AAA 07/19/2024

Four Lunes: Seasons of Friendship, Love, and Heartbreak

A) Summer: Friendship Found

Summer reintroduced us

After a 25 year break

Becoming fast friends.

B) Fall We Meet, Passions Ignite

Fall we met

Things took off from there

Always looking forward.

C) Winter: Cold, Though We Kept Warm

Winter froze us

But we always kept warm

Sustaining each other.

D) Spring: Heartbreak Arrives

Spring consumed all

Ghosting without explanation you disappeared.

A huge disappointment…

-AAA 07/18/2024

Don’t Walk Away, Run!!!

Crocheted Donut by Jenny Gallego

Your love was as satisfying as a crocheted donut for breakfast.

Your compassion was as deep and rich as a red solo cup.

Your passion was as fiery as the heart of a thousand year old glacier.

Your emotional abuse was as consistent as the phases of the moon.

Your disdain for me and anything I found remotely interesting was a death blow.

Taking all of these into consideration, I walked away and never looked back lest I be turned to stone…

-AAA 07/14/2024

Neglected in Love

Chew me up and spit me out

Drop me like an afterthought

This is what your love is all about

Leaving someone to fester and rot.

Take and take and never give

Selfishness your middle name

Not a happy life to live

When the relationship is like a game.

Lure me back when I fade away

Making me thing you just might care

Manipulations led us astray

When you’re caught all unaware.

No amount of love given

Will alter this torturous course

A life of misery is what you are living

Wondering if it can ever get worse.

The only thing to do

Is bring this all to a final end

Loving yourself through and through

Will assure this never happens again…

-AAA 07/05/2024

Nana Mia I Miss You

Originally Posted 04/28/2024

Happy Heavenly 104th Birthday I love you

Nana, where have you gone, why did you have to leave?

You were a huge part of my life since I began to breathe.

You left 8 years before your life ended, as the Alzheimer’s and dementia took your beautiful mind/personality/memory and obliterated it all.

You read all of my poetry and writings when I was a child and then as a young adult and you always encouraged me to keep at it. My first fan ❤️😊

Watching you rapidly disappear from yourself was beyond painful. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.

I know if you had a choice you’d remain forever and I wish you could.

A hideous disease took away your memory of me well before that.

I miss your love and guidance.

I miss your laugh, if I try hard I can still hear it echoing in my mind.

I miss your cooking and ever so slightly broken- English.

I miss your stories of the old country.

I miss your calming energy presence in my life as these past 20 years have been challenging.

I am thankful for all you shared and showed and the mere echo of all of this is nice but nothing compared to your being here.

Thank you for building me up through those awkward horrible teenage years. It took a long time for women to get and frankly most still don’t, but I can hear you still sharply objecting to my self criticism and saying how handsome I was. Thank you for that I always felt like the greatest version of myself when I was around you.

Each time I see someone blog about their grandmother your loss hits me hard again.

So I say to everyone, love the important people in your life because they will not be a part of (in person) forever.

I wish I could hug you one more time and receive what we use to call a “nana kiss” which would leave dents on the jawbone from the shear force. 😂

I never could say goodbye and I never will.

Your love and touches on my life have made the man I am today.

So I thank you and hug you from afar but I cannot lie, it’s nothing compared to hugging you in person.

So “Rosarita Pizza Face” (family nickname) enjoy your eternity (you’ve earned it through love and sacrifice) and your rewards ❤️❤️

-aaa ❤️🌹

Together At Last, My Ideal Manifestation

Originally Published 04/09/2024

I know you so well I know your taste.

That ecstasy contorted look on your face.

I know your beautiful scent.

Destinations we came and went.

New adventures of pleasures await.

Passport for passions with an ideal mate.

Covered in kisses if you desire.

Bodies entwined in instant fire.

Any request that you want to make.

Fulfilled with as much as you can take.

Share with me a deep embrace.

Not a single moment goes to waste.

Chasing dreams just you and me.

The way it was supposed to be.

We met on a random distant shore.

Understanding how it didn’t work out before.

Karmic lessons of our pasts.

Relationships that didn’t last.

All don’t matter wow.

As we’re together now.

It’s all no sudden wonder.

That we manifested each other.

Now silently together in a soft bed.

I caress a weary head.

Your breathing is very deep.

We drift together off to sleep.

-aaa

Thoughts in a Spa

Originally Published 03/18/2024

Basking in the warmth of the hot water jets I try and let go. The nagging guilt, someone I was once very close to gently passed away in her sleep from some infection. No chance to say goodbye or share another moment…

Not even 52 years old, the first woman I was close to after my first exwife at the time. The first woman I knew intimately since my first ex as well.

She was destroyed since her boyfriend/soulmate passed away 2 years ago (hell of a nice guy). She did what she needed to do to survive and it took a toll likely the ultimate one, her health and life.

I’d rather remember her as she lived than how she died. She was a brilliant fun sarcastic bubbly gal that kept me on the edge of my toes 18 years ago. Stunning green eyes, gentle fair face with a smile that could melt the ice caps. A passionate lover and all in all great friend.

We had a lot of fun while we dated for that small fun window in time. I hope you and your beloved are reunited in whatever next awaits us all. Goodbye, gorgeous, and rest in peace. ❤️❤️❤️

-aaa

Where are you Soulmate?

I’m as curious as a puppy

As boisterous as a guppy

I can’t wait to meet you

I can’t wait to greet you.

Where are you hiding

Are you flying or riding?

I’ve miss you all these years

Through the hard times and the tears.

In here and ready to play

So, what do you say?

It’s time for you to appear

And make all my past mistakes clear.

I’ll close my eyes and count to three

Hopefully, thereafter, you’ll be standing by me

Set my lonely heart and needing soul, free

As now, I’m who I’m supposed to be…

I‘m Free

Still image from the film Tommy

Today I no longer owe any more alimony to my ex-wife. I feel so amazing. It’s like getting an $800 a month raise which I am. These past two years I had to pay went by so fast.

It’s a long story. It’s not a great story or a fair one but nonetheless, it’s one that’s coming to an end, today.

In honor of my most recent divorce (I have 1.5 other ones) I have a poem. I’m submitting below. It’s a palindrome poem because those are very challenging and again I’m not saying I don’t endorse the institution of marriage but for me it’s over forever.

As always, thanks for reading.

-aaa

Marriage is Hell is Marriage

Marriage is hell

Husbands manipulate wives

Honesty without commitments in

relationships

In commitments without honesty

Wives manipulate husbands

Hell is marriage

-aaa

My Philosophy Of Love Sex and Everything in Between

⚠️Warning ⚠️

Caution, these are my humble opinions from my experience and my lessons learned with women, etc. is it not facts? Is it not generalizations, rather just an opinion of this guy. lol

Now I need to share some of my approaches and philosophies of sex and love at this time. I know that those first moments of intimacy are the best and are truly beyond fun and amazing. 

First, women control sex, period, end of story no if’s ands or butts, unless they allow it. We as men have to know and accept this and not try to change it because it will never change. The best thing to treat your significant other as well as possible consistently. Make his/her dreams come true and then you will get those intimate physical moments that us men live on and starve without. Treat your partner the way you would want to be treated, but better. Respect and comfort are critical. Most if not all women think they look hideous. It’s not true and you must do all you can to dispel these negative image thoughts because they will hinder you in the bedroom. Build your woman up, tell her she looks amazing and that you feel amazing just standing next to her. Be honest, of course because that should be true or why are you even with her in the first place? 

Plan things out, the perfect dinner, the best time she can have. Drive her, open all doors and order for her at the restaurant after she shares what she wants. Women want a man that can be confident and in control and demonstrate that you can be without being over-bearing. They want to feel safe and know that their needs are being met in every way. You need to help her feel well enough to get naked with you and that’s no small task. I’m an empath and still struggle with the details and keep in mind even if you do everything perfectly it can and often still will not go the way you would like, but that is ok. You will be closer to her for this and she will receive a lot of intimacy even if you don’t and this will bode well for you in the future.

Women are complex amazingly challenging creatures and any number of things in their own minds can take sex out of the picture even if you do your best to help reassure them that they are safe, sexy and beautiful. If this happens, and it will (a lot), just enjoy the moment and quality time you spend together. And believe, me she will remember, and it is a good time to appreciate each other’s company. Sex should never be a goal, it should be an ideal or a place you’d like to get to and if you enjoy and appreciate each other, you will get there at least occasionally. That’s as good as it will get. The grand creator has a great sense of humor. Men are made hungry and women are made thirsty. It is difficult to create a perfect meal that both can enjoy, and sometimes its almost a happy accident. Enjoy it when it happens. In the meantime, treat women the way you know they deserve to be treated not just because they control sex and all physical love but because they will protect and help you too if you help them feel save and empowered.

What about other people, you say! “Joey Schlamoze gets sec every night and Lanie Schlamaze always makes love to her man…” Do not compare, of course you are going to see and hear the best from others because they want you to despise them and want their life. They don’t tell you about the times their partner(s) hit them or have psychological issues. They do not tell you that sex is the only love they know and have. The adage never gets lost that the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. In reality, life doesn’t give most of us even remotely close to what we want, but some are great at masking it making their lives seem ideal. Its all a façade, the happiest sounding people often are far from it. They just want others to envy their life. Worry about your own happiness and keep your lawn (life) healthy always doing what is best for you and your own happiness.

            Ok sex, this is not going to be explicit, at all. I am not Dr. Ruth, nor do I claim to be an expert in anything. This is just my philosophy on sex. I cannot emphasize this enough as it bears repeating, in heterosexual relationships women control sex. Any men attempting to control sex in heterosexual relationships are likely misfits in society and need to be taken out and put away someplace very safe and secure for a long long time. Now, believe it or not we spent a lot of time already taking about women and sex. It is all about how they feel in general and at the time. You want your partner to feel safe with you. You want her to feel cherished beautiful and sexy whether she is thin like a rail or curvy and cute. Appreciate all over her, this starts with her mind. Nothing is sexier than a smart strong-minded woman. Man-up and allow her to be strong, embrace it and have no fear. She is with you that should tell you all you need to know. Listen to what she says with words and her body and you will please her as much as she can stand. Then definitely stop, when she tells you to. 

            Do not worry about your pleasure, if she is feeling, happy, safe, appreciated, fulfilled she will turn that on you. And believe me, you will also feel happy and very appreciated afterwards. That is, it simple, it is all about the woman’s mind. You need to help her feel attractive, safe and secure, and as long as the planets align (it takes that too sometimes) she will let you have her… 

Even if not, you are doing it right, keep in mind there are a million factors that need to be satisfied for sex to happen, and there’s a better than good chance some of them will prevent it from happening. This happens (a lot), do not think it is you or a lack of attraction. It could be anything from a woman feeling heavy because she didn’t like the way a dress looked on her to a model in a magazine article that makes her feel ugly. Never give up hope and do not blame yourself or you’ll go down a rough road that may never end. Take care of you when you need that, she will understand or should as you need a safe harmless release more often than not as we as men need ‘physical affection’. Women do not, remember that…

thank you for reading.

-aaa