Originally Published 04/29/2024

What do you do when the well runs dry? When emotions are only anger and love dies

You reach out and communicate as much as possible but nothing changes her she just doesn’t want you anymore

You better youself and try to get stronger and more attractive but it has no effect and she is not impressed at all

what can I do or say to change how she feels and lives as nothing seems to impact her demeanor or how she feels

I’d seel my soul to get her to love me like I loved her that doesn’t work either she’s moved on

We do things but they feel like bones she has to throw rather than something she wants to do

I’d rather not be an obligation to anyone

I’d rather be a choice than an option

How will I go on, with all this hurt and pain

I always will, force of nature or habit, pick one

I love the kids and grandkids

How will I live without them, that’s very possible starts anew for the third time, is beyond sad

I can never get things right in my life always taking the course of highest resistance moving straight up hill forever seemingly

I just want to be a happy fellow and feel fully actualized in my life

To do so I have to build up myself created an infrastructure that has never existed

I have to create foundations pore concrete and lay down the plans for a new life and a new me that is able to be happy even if alone forever

I don’t know how I will do it all alone but I likely will have to and flourish despite the lonliness

I guess I am destined to be alone maybe it is as it should be…..

I will love myself somehow because it’s necessary.

If I don’t, then no one will…..

-aaa 9/20/21

What do you do when the well runs dry? When emotions are only anger and love dies

You reach out and communicate as much as possible but nothing changes her she just doesn’t want you anymore

You better youself and try to get stronger and more attractive but it has no effect and she is not impressed at all

what can I do or say to change how she feels and lives as nothing seems to impact her demeanor or how she feels

I’d seel my soul to get her to love me like I loved her that doesn’t work either she’s moved on

We do things but they feel like bones she has to throw rather than something she wants to do

I’d rather not be an obligation to anyone

I’d rather be a choice than an option

How will I go on, with all this hurt and pain

I always will, force of nature or habit, pick one

I love the kids and grandkids

How will I live without them, that’s very possible starts anew for the third time, is beyond sad

I can never get things right in my life always taking the course of highest resistance moving straight up hill forever seemingly

I just want to be a happy fellow and feel fully actualized in my life

To do so I have to build up myself created an infrastructure that has never existed

I have to create foundations pore concrete and lay down the plans for a new life and a new me that is able to be happy even if alone forever

I don’t know how I will do it all alone but I likely will have to and flourish despite the lonliness

I guess I am destined to be alone maybe it is as it should be…..

I will love myself somehow because it’s necessary.

If I don’t, then no one will…..

-aaa 9/20/21