Originally Posted 04/28/2024

Happy Heavenly 104th Birthday I love you

Nana, where have you gone, why did you have to leave?

You were a huge part of my life since I began to breathe.

You left 8 years before your life ended, as the Alzheimer’s and dementia took your beautiful mind/personality/memory and obliterated it all.

You read all of my poetry and writings when I was a child and then as a young adult and you always encouraged me to keep at it. My first fan ❤️😊

Watching you rapidly disappear from yourself was beyond painful. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.

I know if you had a choice you’d remain forever and I wish you could.

A hideous disease took away your memory of me well before that.

I miss your love and guidance.

I miss your laugh, if I try hard I can still hear it echoing in my mind.

I miss your cooking and ever so slightly broken- English.

I miss your stories of the old country.

I miss your calming energy presence in my life as these past 20 years have been challenging.

I am thankful for all you shared and showed and the mere echo of all of this is nice but nothing compared to your being here.

Thank you for building me up through those awkward horrible teenage years. It took a long time for women to get and frankly most still don’t, but I can hear you still sharply objecting to my self criticism and saying how handsome I was. Thank you for that I always felt like the greatest version of myself when I was around you.

Each time I see someone blog about their grandmother your loss hits me hard again.

So I say to everyone, love the important people in your life because they will not be a part of (in person) forever.

I wish I could hug you one more time and receive what we use to call a “nana kiss” which would leave dents on the jawbone from the shear force. 😂

I never could say goodbye and I never will.

Your love and touches on my life have made the man I am today.

So I thank you and hug you from afar but I cannot lie, it’s nothing compared to hugging you in person.

So “Rosarita Pizza Face” (family nickname) enjoy your eternity (you’ve earned it through love and sacrifice) and your rewards ❤️❤️

-aaa ❤️🌹